In the words of poet John Donne, “No man is an island, entire of itself.” For the majority of people who end up living on their own for one reason or another, it can be a lonely life. Whether the cause is divorce, the end of a long-term relationship, or one’s children simply flying the nest, finding oneself alone can have devastating effects.
One way to relieve the misery is to tidy up and sort out your immediate surroundings. Restoring material order can go a long way towards restoring order in your emotional life. The key, of course, to having to adapt to a new life without the person you once loved is having a positive attitude and being willing to try to move on with life. But a change of scenery and a sense of order can definitely help.
If the person passed away, you need to find a happy medium where you can keep his or her belongings in a respectful manner but at the same time your home does not stay mired in the past as if he or she is about to walk in at any moment. Although you may want to keep things that way at the very beginning as part of mourning your loss, after a while you should try to find a way to build your future even though this may be very hard. For example, you could devote a corner of your living room or bedroom to photographs of your loved one and his or her favorite keepsakes and pictures. But you should fold away clothing and personal items so that you do not have to keep being constantly reminded of your loss. You do not have to part with these items as they may be very precious to you for a very long time. But you can box them and store them inside a loft or cupboard that you have assigned especially for this purpose.
If, on the other hand, you have just gone through a painful divorce, you may find that the best thing is to put away and throw out as many reminders of that part of your life as possible. Of course, if you have children, it is imperative to let them keep photos of their other parent for their sake. No matter how upset and angry you may feel, your ex is still a part of your children’s history. Therefore, the best solution here is to let your children hang up pictures in their own rooms, but to remove them from the living room and your bedroom. Let them keep various items and compile photo albums for themselves, but clear everything else out of your personal area.
Once you have tidied up and sorted out, you may feel like painting the walls or changing the laminate flooring to carpet flooring just to give yourself a feeling of newness and moving on. This is a very healthy part of the process. It will make you feel more independent and positive about the road ahead. And hopefully things will start to get much better soon.
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